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oh bloody hell

Mike Pence is responsible for the most restrictive anti-abortion law in the country.  The law passed by Mr. Pence is vague enough that women could  be jailed for having difficult pregnancies.  The law also forbids parents from opting to have an abortion if the fetus has Down’s Syndrome,or any fetal abnormality.  The bill also banned abortion due to the fetus’ race, or gender.  The bill even went so far as to dictate funeral requirements for any remains after an abortion or MISCARRIAGE.  All remains were required to be buried or cremated!  Thank God I don’t live in Indiana, as I personally had two miscarriages after about 6 weeks.  Imagine the challenge of finding a casket the appropriate size for the those remains.

#periodsforpence and #tamponsfortrump are two twitter groups organized to ask the Mr. Pence and Mr. Trump how we should use our reproductive organs, when, how often, with whom, and those all- important end-of-life decisions regarding our eggs.

Some of the Twitter remarks and questions include:

Now, where can I send my used pads and tampons so Pence can look through my eggs?

Indiana Governor Mike Pence is quite familiar with the details of his constituent’s cycles. 

(Call to the Governor’s office)I need to get a message to the Governor that I am on day three of my period.  My flow seems abnormally heavy, but my cramps are much better …

Raw Story lists phone numbers to call if you have questions about difficulties with menstruation, about death of a loved one’s eggs,  or frustration arising from sexual dysfunction.  Here are some I tried:

Trump Headquarters:  646-736-1779

Republican Convention:  216-263-2016

Mike Pence’s Gubernatorial Office:  317-2324567

I personally called each.  Nobody answered at the Trump office.  I think they were in hiding.  I had my calls answered by the Republican Convention office and Governor Pence’s office.  To my surprise, each of the people I spoke with were rude, in-spite of my cordial nature.  I would encourage everyone to call to get answers to your questions.  If I had been able to pose my questions before “Tommy” hung up on me, I would have liked to know:

  1.  Does Mike have a recommendation for the proper way to deal with a yeast infection.
  2. What does he think about douching?
  3. If a person miscarries at 6 weeks gestation, are they required to embalm the fetus?
  4. How do you get a death certificate for a 6 week old fetus?
  5. Can I get life insurance on any fetus?
  6. Does a fetus have second amendment rights?
  7. Is there a prayer that would be appropriate before sexual intercourse?

god laughing two clouds


 

Republican Senator Ben Sasse of Nebraska will miss his party’s national convention in Cleveland later this month because he is planning to “take his kids to watch some dumpster fires across the state.”

dumpster fire

dumpster fire funny

 

Jeff Flake, a Republican of Arizona, said he won’t be at the convention because “I’ve got to mow my lawn.”

lawn mowing funny

We already knew that Sarah Palin wouldn’t be there because Alaska is just too damn far away.

palin wink

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Sarah Palin didn’t really send this e-mail.  I can only speculate about what an e-mail might look like when Sarah finds out she isn’t even slotted to appear at the Republican Convention.

*******************************************************

palin snarl

 

To: The Donald

From:  The Quitter

Subject:  Only You Can Prevent Fires

Do you know who I am?  Do you want me to reload?  Do you want to land in my crosshairs?

palin crosshairs

How could you think of not inviting me to appear at the Convention?!

Do you know how many cases of arson have remained unsolved in Alaska?

An overnight fire at Gov. Sarah Palin's church, Wasilla Assembly of God, caused an estimated $1 million in damage, and investigators say it could be the work of an arsonist, Saturday, December 13, 2008. (Stephen Nowers/Anchorage Daily News/MCT)

dar miller

dairy fire

You have several planes.

trump plane one

Do you know what happens to planes if they get water in their tanks?

curtis menard

I was one of the first people to endorse you, even though it made me look foolish to have previously campaigned for Ted Cruz.

palin cruz at rally palin cruz hug

When I spoke about you, I didn’t say anything that anyone understood.

I’m not as eloquent as you at saying nothing, but I’m pretty good.

 

We have so much in common.

  1.  We have both been unfaithful to our spouses.

palin brad hanson natl enquirer

2.  You have a private plane.  I’v ridden on one.

trump plane four small jet

3.  We both pretend to love guns.

4.  Neither of us goes to church.

5.  We are both racists.

6.  We both are motivated by money and publicity.

7.  We both have attracted attention because of our hair.

trump funny hair two  palin wig 6

8.  We both have great tans!

palin tan hand

MUST BYLINE: EROTEME.CO.UK Donald Trump admires pictures of himself from fans as he arrives at the Good Morning America studios NON-EXCLUSIVE November 15, 2011 Job: 111115P3 New York, New York EROTEME.CO.UK 44 207 431 1598

9.  We both have Black friends.

trump tyson

 

glen rice and palin

10.  We both love beauty pageants.

trump beauty one

 

palin beauty contest

11.  You rape women,and I tried to make sure rapists in Alaska didn’t get caught.

12.  Your wife is gorgeous.

melanis trump naked

So am I.

palin fat two

13. We both like pizza.

alg-trump-palin-2-jpg

14.  You live in New York.  I have been there.

palin pink shirt new york

15.  You’ve met Todd.  I’m married to him.

trump todd

16.  We both claim to have 5 kids.

palin pregnant

17.  I have a dog.

trig standing on dog

You are one.

trump dog one

18.  We both have done irreversible damage to the Republican Party.

trump kills gop

19.  We have both screwed people out of their money.

trump bankruptcy

palin money mouth

20.  We have both been television personalities.

sarah palin's alaska  trump apprentice

21.  We have both written books.

going rogue  trump art deal

22.  We both wear underwear.I have somebody else wash mine.  You don’t wash yours.

palin panties  trump jock strap

23.  We have both been made to look foolish by Stephen Colbert.

Remember his epic take down of Paul Revere’s ride.

Then he embarrassed you about  the Trump vs. Trump debate.

24.  Hillary has attacked us both.

25.  I’m a quitter. You might quit.

26.  You have eight grandchildren, all conceived after marriage.  I have at least three, one on the way, and none were conceived after marriage.

27.   You believe in a woman’s right to choice, even if it’s a partial birth abortion.

I  believe a woman shouldn’t have a choice, even in cases of rape and incest.

 

There are two big differences between us.  I am Undefeated.  You might be defeated if you don’t pick me as your running mate.

palin undefeated

I don’t think a woman should be punished if she has an abortion.

 

You do.


monkey laughing

 

Enjoy!

 

 


Evolution of the Feminine Mystique

Just Say NO to BS

The Ignorance of Sarah Palin

Rebuttal to the Rogue

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