Sarah Palin Gives Trump Advice on Quitting

Image result for sarah palin quitter

It’s not true!  Donald Trump doesn’t ask any woman for advice. He hasn’t asked anyone for any advice for anything.  However if he did ask for advice on quitting, Sarah Palin would be the one to ask.  If there is one thing she’s an expert on, it’s quitting.  Just imagine what her e-mail to the Donald might look like.

Image result for donald trump quit

To:  The Don

From: The Quitter-in-Chief

Re: Save Yourself!

Dear Donald,

Look, I know it’s bin a ruff few weaks.  The Holy Spirit whispered in my eer  and sed that you needed sum help!  He sed that if I helped you, you’d help me get a job doing a reality show.  My idea for a name fer hour knew show is the “Vice-Presidential Apprentice”.  At the end of every show one of the contestants would say, “I Quit.”  I would bee the moderator and you could be my first guest.  It’d be a Yuge success.  More people would watch than at any time in history.  Hears the plot for the first epesode.  You’d be the President of thu USA and under investigation by the IRS for tax fraud.  The mainstream media wouldn’t leeve you alone.  You had taken a deduction for all of Melania’s living expenses at Trump Tower since you’ve had to pay for out of yer own pocket, and especially fer mother’s day.  Cents Melania’s living expenses would have bin paid by the taxpayers if she were living in the White House, you should at least get a deduction for them if she stays in New York, and you have to pay ‘em.

Image result for trump tower funny

I could get my friends at Duck Dynasty to take you shootin, and my frend Ted Nugent could play the theme song for the show.  Willow would do your hare.  It couldn’t be worse than it is now.  For your costumes, you already have the blue suit and red tie, and I already have my tableshirt, so we won’t have hi overhede.  Todd would make sure your sexual needs are met without you ever havin to grab another pussy yourself.  Bristol knows what to do with any offspring, and Track will beat up any woman who complains about your little fingers.  At the end of every show I will make blueberry pie and you can have two scups of ice cream on yours.

Image result for trump two scoops ice cream

At the end of the show all you have to do is git your friends in Russia to offer you a job, and you could announce you are quittin your job as President for the good of the people.  It serves the people in ‘Merica right if they have ta git a new President as you told them what you’d do if elected and you gave them plenty of warning that they should never believe you.  What a bunch of idiots!

I have one condition to the dill.  You gotta get rid of the Kellyanne girl.  Every time she speaks, people roll their eyes.

Image result for anderson cooper eye roll

We can’t have alternative episodes.  She makes my skin crawl and my wig curl.  We can keep the Spice guy, an he can make commercials for Old Spice and your new landscaping company called “One in the Bushes”.

Image result for old spice evergreen  Image result for sean spicer bushes

We can also make money from SNL by paying us a commission frum every episode wear we provide the subject matter for the skits.

Nun of this’ll work if you wait to announce the show till after your impeared.  Call a press conference, don’t let anyone else handle the conference, and announce you’re a Quitter.  Ivanka can keep her office at the White House, and can keep her title that seems to be a real advantage for her business and there will no longer be a nepotism problem.

Image result for ivanka trump funny

If none of these ideas work, you might be able to be the next spokesperson for Nutri-system and make a yuge salary that way.

Image result for donald trump fatImage result for donald trump fat

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Good Luck!  Sarah

16 thoughts on “Sarah Palin Gives Trump Advice on Quitting

Add yours

  1. LOL. Still wonder about that abrupt hiring and quitting and McCain looking like he had just been raped. Did the Russians help sara too? We know how she was miss controversy wasilly and how she slinked her way from city counsel to rigging elections to gov. Blind Allegiance to Sarah Palin. Yep. Same nasty dirty liar low class mobster from Wasilla.


  2. Malia – If anyone should know how to quit, it’s the Wasilla loon. SNL was hilarious on Saturday. Melissa McCarthy should get an award. The open with Baldwin was excellent.


  3. He should just fucking give up.

    It’s Tuesday afternoon – he can be back in the private sector by Wednesday morning.

    And surely nothing would make Melania happier than to have her man back all to herself in Manhattan every night in that big bed with her she’s so lucky and slutty.


    1. He’s now being called “Grotesque” from Ann Coulter, who, as evidenced by her book “In Trump We Trust”, would have, for years, given her left tit for him.

      Throw in the right tit, too. They’re small.


  4. Quit right now, Trump. You can be a private citizen in time for a late dinner with Melania this evening.
    And your son, Barron, whom Melania was hiding behind so she wouldn’t have to see you.


  5. I never said I quit. I said Ikwit which is an old athaskahooligan native word loosely translated as not finishing the job you have,

    Did I ever tell you of the time I gave a press conference in front of turkeys being slaughtered? I did?


  6. Maybe instead of asking Sarah Palin to give Donald Trump about advice on quitting you should ask her to give Donald Trump some help on understanding how little schemes and big schemes sometimes turn out badly.

    Now about this Sarah Palin “quitting” thing, do Mike Hawker and Senator Dan Sullivan really think Sarah Palin “quit?” Someone should ask them for the rest of the story.

    I think there is some evidence that could support the idea that Sarah Palin was offered the opportunity to resign quickly (“quit”) to avoid the possibility of more public and serious consequences (investigated, fired!, and possibly indicted.) What was already on offer for Sarah Palin from her fellow Alaska Republican legislators at the time she “quit” was something like another Troopergate styled investigation and the unsaid but not unlikely possible impeachment. That would have been an infamous Alaskan first for her! Sarah Palin “quitting” was probably similar to Bill O’Reilly “not returning” to Fox News.

    “Quitting” vs an investigation into certain activities and possible impeachment. One of these involves less effort and embarrassment, and the other could have offered a troubling look into the behind the scenes dill making and score settling Sarah Palin engaged in as governor. A real investigation into Sarah Palin by the Alaska Legislature could have possibly led to some sort of indictment depending upon what might have been found with Troopergate Part Two and no VP nomination to stall and obstruct the fact finding.

    Someone should ask Sarah Palin if she remembers how reporting some of her fellow Alaskan Republicans were making her feel threatened turned out for her.

    I think I remember that she used a word like irrational, it’s in the emails. I suppose Sarah Palin knows what that word means.

    Like here:

    And here:

    Almost like a coincidence that the second blowup happened just a few days before she “quit.”
    Almost like a coincidence that what team Sarah labeled as “threat”, “BS”, and “irrational” was forwarded to the new Alaska Attorney General Dan Sullivan just a few days before Governor Sarah Palin “quit.”

    It might have looked even worse if some of these same people and websites that were involved in attacking her fellow Alaskan Republican legislators were the same ones helping publicize Governor Sarah’s “legal defense fund” that was later described as “illegal”. WHOOPS THEY WERE!

    Someone should find out what really was behind Sarah Palin’s July 3, 2009 resignation.


      1. Contact Austinisafecker about this.

        If you two work together on this it could be like a tag team for the truth.

        Like Keith Olbermann used to say: “That woman is an idiot.”


      2. Here are some more links for another thing you or someone else could check into.

        Did Sarah Palin make a secret succession dill in late June of 2009? Did this possible secret dill about who would be the new LT. Governor if for “some reason” Sarah Palin wasn’t the Governor of Alaska anymore? Then when Sarah Palin “quit” did her secret dill with Craig C. (that wouldn’t be the new LT Gov Craig Campbell would it) cause a constitutional crisis which required a legislative special session to fix?

        Too bad about her stimulus veto getting overridden also too!


      3. Also too refer to a few pages of Geoffrey Dunn’s book The Lies of Sarah Palin beginning on page 368 for more details on the constitutional crisis her secret dill with “Craig C” caused when she “quit.”

        Gryphen might know something about this too.


  7. Much more was found out about the palin family during 2008 by USA citizens. Like trump? there are dead bodies, human trafficking, drugs, lies, treason and rape. Sara, Trump and their lying ass buddies must not have the ability to take pleas, escape public embarrassment nor get away with crimes another day. This shit must stop.


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