Call The Trump Office Today to Get Answers to Your Menstruation Questions

oh bloody hell

Mike Pence is responsible for the most restrictive anti-abortion law in the country.  The law passed by Mr. Pence is vague enough that women could  be jailed for having difficult pregnancies.  The law also forbids parents from opting to have an abortion if the fetus has Down’s Syndrome,or any fetal abnormality.  The bill also banned abortion due to the fetus’ race, or gender.  The bill even went so far as to dictate funeral requirements for any remains after an abortion or MISCARRIAGE.  All remains were required to be buried or cremated!  Thank God I don’t live in Indiana, as I personally had two miscarriages after about 6 weeks.  Imagine the challenge of finding a casket the appropriate size for the those remains.

#periodsforpence and #tamponsfortrump are two twitter groups organized to ask the Mr. Pence and Mr. Trump how we should use our reproductive organs, when, how often, with whom, and those all- important end-of-life decisions regarding our eggs.

Some of the Twitter remarks and questions include:

Now, where can I send my used pads and tampons so Pence can look through my eggs?

Indiana Governor Mike Pence is quite familiar with the details of his constituent’s cycles. 

(Call to the Governor’s office)I need to get a message to the Governor that I am on day three of my period.  My flow seems abnormally heavy, but my cramps are much better …

Raw Story lists phone numbers to call if you have questions about difficulties with menstruation, about death of a loved one’s eggs,  or frustration arising from sexual dysfunction.  Here are some I tried:

Trump Headquarters:  646-736-1779

Republican Convention:  216-263-2016

Mike Pence’s Gubernatorial Office:  317-2324567

I personally called each.  Nobody answered at the Trump office.  I think they were in hiding.  I had my calls answered by the Republican Convention office and Governor Pence’s office.  To my surprise, each of the people I spoke with were rude, in-spite of my cordial nature.  I would encourage everyone to call to get answers to your questions.  If I had been able to pose my questions before “Tommy” hung up on me, I would have liked to know:

  1.  Does Mike have a recommendation for the proper way to deal with a yeast infection.
  2. What does he think about douching?
  3. If a person miscarries at 6 weeks gestation, are they required to embalm the fetus?
  4. How do you get a death certificate for a 6 week old fetus?
  5. Can I get life insurance on any fetus?
  6. Does a fetus have second amendment rights?
  7. Is there a prayer that would be appropriate before sexual intercourse?

god laughing two clouds

10 thoughts on “Call The Trump Office Today to Get Answers to Your Menstruation Questions

Add yours

  1. Women have early miscarriages without even realizing it. Would he prosecute them? I had an early one and was not sure if I had miscarried until confirmed by a doctor. Men do not understand women’s bodies unless they are medically trained. Imagine how many women had abortions after they got pregnant by Donald Trump? Shouldn’t Trump be held accountable too? Why do these men only hold the women accountable when the men were the ones who impregnated the women? Trump has bragged publicly about his many conquests. He also raped a thirteen year old girl and he gets a pass on that too? I doubt that lawsuit will go anywhere either. Trump will make sure it never gets to court.


    1. Petunia,
      I don’t have any hope that Trump will change. It’s up to us to change the perception of him by those who support him.


  2. I hope that the Trump camp get an overwhelming amount of callers and emailers asking all of those questions! Write on my friend write on!


  3. Without guys like pence I would never have been born. When I crawled out of the pit at the bottom of the outhouse, I could not believe how beautiful the world was. I thought life was a shit storm with yellow rain.

    The way things are going I miss the old outhouse. Things were simpeler then. All I hear from Todd and Sarah is to eat shit and die. It appears to be a better option than the shit storm I am in with this couple.

    Technology sucks. I can barley fit into those new fangled things they call toilets. I am heading to Indiana to find a nice comfortable outhouse where sarah and Todd can’t find me. Well I can dream at least. Like mom always said you have choices everyday. “Hope or a rope” My neck is killing me so I choose hope at least for today.


    1. painchipeater,
      Just be glad you aren’t a woman living in a country ruled by Trump and Pence! In that case you’d have to deal with all the shit at the same time you’d have to deal with blood coming out of your…wherever.


  4. Should we ask our partners to join us in prayer after sex and the death of all those poor, innocent little spermies? The tragic loss of those innocent spermies should be recognized for what it is! We all know it’s a deliberate act of murder of those tiny, brave little spermies who didn’t ask to be created and their right to life shouldn’t be denied by any man for any reason.

    Every single one! No exceptions! God will judge those men who show a disgraceful lack of respect for the sanctity of life. Stop the madness! They can have all the sex they want but without releasing one – not ONE – tiny sperm who’s life will be snuffed out within 24 to 36 hours. How sad!

    Bastards!! Cruel bastards!


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